Sunday, April 7, 2013

How blessed am I.

This weekend we spent most of our time in Omaha, seeing Kley's family. It was a great time. Most of the women on Kley's side make a Saturday shopping trip twice a year (since the OC malls are nonexistent :) We went up on Friday night to celebrate Elizabeth's (my sister-in-law) birthday. We went to this fun Italian restaurant and had a good time catching up. We stayed in a hotel, ordered room service in the morning, and felt like we were living in luxury. :) We went shopping on Saturday, while Kley and Brad golfed, and it was so great. My mother-in-law, Jana, is one of the most generous, selfless, and giving people I know, and spoiled me rotton. It was a great time!

The ride home was interesting. We were driving back late last night- later than we thought we would, it had been a long full day, we were both tired, and I wasn't feeling very good. We had a talk about our future in the next year. This will be a big year for us. Considering where to live, Kley graduating law school, adding a home and children sometime in the future- all wonderful things. We are so blessed with the bright future ahead of us.

But at the same time, it's scary. Unknown is scary. Change is scary. I don't adapt to change well- it takes a lot of time for me. It's overwhelming to think of all the change that will/could happen in the next year. Good things, but still scary because these are major life decisions.

We had a great talk, but after I started thinking, and my mind wandered into worry and anxiousness. We started to talk about our schedule for the morning of the timing of things/church events, and I freaked out about doing a load of laundry- what time I would do it at and whether I would get it done or not. I allowed my anxiousness about the looming future and our previous talk to spew out at Kley in trivial anger.

Kley was so gracious to me. He calmly asked me to stop being angry and shutting down, and to talk about what was really bothering me. He offered to do the laundry on Monday while I was at work.  That little act of kindness broke me, that he would be offering to lighten my burdens even in the midst of me acting like a total pain, and I started sobbing and told him everything.

I apologized for being so angry and taking it out on him for something so trivial. Who looses it over what time they are going to do their laundry the next day? (Me, I guess). Kley forgave me, let me let it all out, and told me that's what he wanted all along- just to let it out and talk to him.

Thank you, God, for perspective. For hope. For a bright future. For being with me all along the way.

I am so grateful for my family- mine and Kley's. We are truly grateful to have such supporting, loving, and encouraging families.

I am grateful for my husband- that he will love me when when I don't deserve it, comfort me when I cry, not react in anger back at me, and simply just love me all the time.

I am grateful for our bright future. No matter what happens, that we are in this together and that Christ is leading us.

How blessed am I.


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